Life is a Journey
When I first thought about starting a blog, it was solely going to be for my parents and the grief of losing them but my “why” is really so much more. I have spent the last 20+ years working on healing, the grief process, and trying to find my purpose. I was trying to find myself and my purpose as I was raising my two beautiful boys and taking care of our household of four. I went back to school a few times graduating in massage therapy and a BS in Early Childhood Education. Throughout my journey, I have questioned every single thing but most of all I constantly asked myself if I was good enough...as a mother, a wife, a student, and an employee. This journey has brought so many twists and turns that has left me wondering where I fit and why can I not find my true purpose. I was longing to be of service in this world and could not get grounded. This led me to struggle with my own demons of the “not good enough” story which became inner turmoil only to wreak havoc on my physical, emotional, and spiritual health and well-being. It wasn’t until recently when I was having a conversation with my life coach, that I had an “Ah-ha” moment. This moment brings me to tears every single time I talk about it. We were talking about my mom and I had expressed that I longed for that feeling of having her here giving me that unconditional love, the love no one else but your mother can give you. I missed that so much that it made my heart ache even after she had been gone for 24 years. She was the one person that understood me completely, every aspect of me with no judgment and just pure love. In this moment talking about it, what I realized was that I had spent the last 24 years after my mom died trying to fill her shoes and be like her so I wouldn’t forget how special she was and carry out her legacy. In all those years, I forgot to stop and love myself just as she loved me. Self-love which is the greatest gift we can give ourself! My mother got lost in all of her giving to others that she also lost herself and took care of everyone else instead of herself. Unfortunately, I do believe this is why she got cancer and that is what took her life. My mom struggled emotionally from all the loss in her family plus it was an era of women in households taking care of things while husbands worked. She was creative, funny, and so very talented. She had many dreams, one of which was to open a restaurant. Sadly, none of these dreams came true as she slowly lost herself in her own grief and caregiving of others. Although she was the best caregiver and mother, I do believe that she lost herself and her self-love. Cancer is a disease (dis-ease) and this is what took her life at the early age of 63. What I also realized is that not only do I need to love myself just as my own mother did but to help others feel worthy and love themselves as if they were their own mothers.
Fast forward to 2023…
Wow reading this again still brings tears to my eyes! However, I think it is important to share again because through my own healing journey I have found my true life’s purpose by becoming a Life Coach. It is an honor to work with individuals who are struggling moving towards their dreams and feeling stuck. Whether that is in grief, lack of self-worth, or anything holding them back. The possibilities are truly endless if we just put in the work and follow our hearts. As a life coach, I hold space and guide individuals to uncover limiting beliefs and help them move towards the life they have always .
Through this blog I will share with you my healing process and journey with stories, songs, conversations, and the many contributions that have helped me along the way. All my love to all of you...You are enough and you are so loved!